i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Randomize
