are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Randomize