Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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