u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
