just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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