i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
