Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
