Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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