Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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