North Korea, Best Korea!
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
