Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Shitshow foam night was such a success
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Randomize
