I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
