Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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