I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize