May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
