he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
