'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we convert life to cartoon?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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