matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
soo... how was my night?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
