it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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