if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
