We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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