Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
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