Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
