do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
