I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
