38 yer olds are good kisserssss
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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