I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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