so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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