It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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