apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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