if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
