When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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