i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
