i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
