oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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