I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
stop calling my apartment porn island.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
