Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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