So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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