So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
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He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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