i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
