You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
