Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
