Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
pop tarts are not kleenex
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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