Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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