I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
