On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
