..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize