so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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