Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
