Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
